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| Main l How to Quit Heroin l How to Quit Heroin Cold Turkey l How to Survive the First 7 Days l Real Testimonies l Contact Me | |||||||||||||||||
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If your son or daughter is hooked on heroin, then don’t despair. As long as they’re still alive then there’s still hope yet. And if your child lives within your home, then the first thing you’re going to have to do is hide all of your jewelry, your purse, your checkbook, your credit cards and any other valuable and sellable items within your home. Heroin will turn your children into liars and thieves. Don't take any chances. And from here on out, don’t give your child any money whatsoever no matter they tell you. No more money. Period! Then take the time to read and learn as much as you can about heroin and heroin addiction. Read and learn about heroin withdrawal symptoms and the pain and agony associated with such withdrawals. Learn about the different methods used for quitting heroin and then start planning.
Become more strict, more stern, yet more loving and more concerned for your son or daughter. Become more concerned about 'raising' and 'influencing' your child properly. Start showing your child more love, affection and compassion. Set new rules and guidelines. As long as your son or daughter is living under your roof then they must abide by your rules. Lay down the law. You have more control over how that child's life turns out than what you might think. Start doing everything in your power to learn proper child raising principles no matter how old they are. Begin to retrain and influence your child in a correct and proper manner and in time he or she just might conform. Negative or tragic events that have taken place in the child's life will have to be dealt with before they can be permanently left in the past. Bad friends will have to be removed from your child's life and replaced with drug-free, family members and friends. Your son or daughter will have to be surrounded by caring and loving people who truly have a genuine concern for your child's welfare and recovery. If you have a son, then you'll want to involve older, drug-free, trusted male figures who can set a good example before your son. If you have a daughter then you'll want to involve older, decent and moral female figures to take on the big sister role. Try to keep it in the family but don’t be scared to reach out for help outside the family. And since music has such a powerful effect on a child's behavior, attitudes, feelings, emotions, temper, actions and thoughts, then you may want to consider removing bad music from your home and replacing it with good music in order to see a change in your child's behavior.
Music changes people. Therefore, change the music and you'll change the person. Today's most popular music was created and purposely designed to be used as a tool for character formation, and unfortunately, of the worst kind. Most people, especially our younger generation today, follow their idols blindly, and in time become, or try to become just like them, by imitating how they talk, how they walk, how they act, how they dress, how they live, how they sing, and everything that pertains to them including using the same drugs that they use, including heroin. Thus, character formation of the worse kind. We are what we eat. If you eat junk food, then you become walking junk. Junk in- junk out. We are what we watch. If you watch porn all day, then eventually, you'll become a pervert and a sex addict. And in the same sense, we are and become what we listen to the most. “Thus, what you listen to literally forms what you become”, LDA. Rap, hip hop, R&B, reggaeton, rock, classic rock, metal, techno and alternative are some of the worst kinds of music that you and your child could be listening to due to the filthy, violent and perverted lyrics; the distorted sound; the hypnotic, pounding, negative beats; the fowl and corrupt singers; the negative energy and influence being put forth from the music; and the evil millionaires behind the record companies with their hidden agenda. If you need proof of such then all you have to do is take a look at our younger generation today. They're going down hill faster than ever before. They’ve become a product of the music. This is the end result. Softies, oldies, 50's, 60's, 70’s, 80’s and classic country music are some of the best and safest types of music to listen to due to the clean lyrics; the natural and clear sound; the soft beats; and for the most part, the better raised singers; the better raised people behind the music and the more positive energy and influence being put forth from the music without a hidden agenda. Good, clean music helps. Read what these x-heroin addicts had to say about music: "you are so right man, music does effects you, a lot whenever i hear rock/metal, i remember my old days." BB (male) UPDATE:"neither heroin nor weed, just sum cigarettes, that too, once in a month or so, liftin weights keep me sane, most of it... thanx man, i will never forget you, ever. nowadays m listening to elvis presley, frank sinatra, pavarotti etc. i listened to sum country stuf" BB (male) "Thanks Jorge, for this really great info. I've been on a lot of addiction drug boards, and never knew some of the stuff you have written back to me. Currently, I almost feel like I can stand on 2 feet, and I have taken your advice about the valerian root. It helps a lot with the calming. And the music, i managed to actually make a few CD's and made it through work today. I'll get those movies you recommended, I used to love to watch movies before this, and funny movies. Thanks again, great website and info...!!! JJ (male) UPDATE: "Really like the music bit in your essay. That did work for me, listening to good music." JJ (male) "I'm on my 8 night... I really enjoyed your website you need to let the people know that music really helps!!!!!" TC (male) "This music is so crazy awesome!!!!! The power of music is so amazing!!!! Fly high to the sky" A (female) "we are now dec 27th with out any issues. again I think we are getting there, for the parents out there that want to give up don't. each time we took him a little longer in days till I now think we have done it. We have used your program as are guide and didnt give up. Guided him to find new friends, music. thank you for putting this site up !!! We have done this with out any meds of any kind so it can be done. I will keep you posted. Thanks again." JJ (father helping son) NEW: "Day 42 no nothing!!!!!... I can't express in words how your link helped, I also can't believe the music you recommended - now I know why people loved Elvis and 60s etc... I ain't listen to hip hop , drum n bass for a while. I hope and pray that others find your site and change their lives..." AU (male) Good, clean, positive music helps greatly. And good music performed by good people can make a huge difference in your child's recovery. (If interested, you can order music CD's of good, clean, decent music performed by a good, clean, decent show band called 24K Gold Music Shows: www.c24k.com Contact them and ask them about their music CD's. They'll be glad to help you out.) It even helps to have the 'good music' playing on in the background at home or in the car. You may even have to sneak the 'new music' in carefully, but eventually it will serve its purpose. A good parent leads by example. It’s your home and you have the right to ban any and all bad music from being played within your home. And these are not extreme measures by any means. It's just good common sense. Bad music will draw in negative influence and negative energy into your home. While playing good music continuously will create a positive environment. It's your home. And you need to put your foot down and take control in every area, or else your child will walk all over you. Even if you're a single mom - don't be afraid to lay down the law. Regarding boredom and loneliness, you'll have to plan on doing everything you can to eliminate the boredom and loneliness which your son or daughter will go through while detoxing and during recovery as well. It’s a dangerous place to be for your child. You'll have to start planning fun and productive activities to do with your child on a continual bases. If possible, try to start involving drug-free, decent, family members and friends to help you keep your child busy throughout the week. For example; joining a gym with your child and starting your days with daily exercise routines followed by some form of cardio, such as walking fast, jogging, running or biking, taking long walks in the park, walking through beautiful and natural scenic views can help greatly. And if you’re not able to accompany your son or daughter in such activities then find someone who can. You can both go hiking, site seeing; rock wall climbing; walking in the mall; shopping for even one item, a piece of clothing or a music CD; bike riding; going to parks just to hang out and talk; visiting the zoo; watching inspirational movies at home; bowling; go kart racing; horse back riding; skating; and any other fun activities and events that you can think of. Plan wisely and try to do as many fun activities as you can in order to keep your child's mind busy, off of heroin and on the moment at hand. Always keep it clean, fun and active in order to keep your child in a positive state of mind. This will help him greatly, not only during recovery, but also for the many months ahead. If you're truly determined and dedicated to saving your child's life, then plan on being in this battle for the long run; 6-12 months or more. You'll have to counteract your child's feelings of loneliness by always surrounding him with drug-free, family members and friends. Try to involve as many people as you can in your child's recovery who you know for sure are drug-free, decent people who can become a positive influence in your child's life. It’s in those moments of boredom and loneliness where he or she will start to think about doing heroin. Your child will start thinking and dwelling on the thoughts of how good they used to feel from that heroin high. And if they stay thinking on it long enough then just like that, they'll escape and go use. To avoid any possible triggers for relapse, you’ll have to write down your master rescue plan on paper and stick with it. If you think that some, or none of the above is necessary, then think again. And if you think that its just a matter of helping your child get clean and stay clean for a month or two and then letting them go out into the world and all will be fine, then you've got another thing coming. This stuff takes times. And on top of that, your child has to want this too. They say that true recovery begins after the user has abstained from heroin for 1 year. This process takes time. It takes time to undo the damage and start life all over again. It takes time to retrain ones mind and body to live without heroin. Your son or daughter will be most vulnerable during the first 3 to 6 months but will still need guidance and care for the rest of the year. But if you want to save your child's life then get ready for a long hard battle, and be prepared to win. Heroin addiction is the absolute worst drug addiction in the world, destroying the will of man, and thus the old saying; “Nobody quits heroin... nobody”... But the truth is, few there be that quit heroin, stay clean, and turn their lives around. And your son or daughter can become one of the few who quit heroin and stay clean for good. You can help make that dream come true. Once you've identified the root(s) of the problem(s) and have written down the solutions then prepare yourself to go in for the save. But remember, nothing is guaranteed. But you’re better off trying to help your child than to let them continue to die without doing anything about it. Again, if your son or daughter has already reached out for help then great! Phase 1 complete. If not, then you will have to perform a carefully planned intervention. Even if you have already talked to them about it to a certain degree and have been trying to deal with the problem to no avail, then you may want to step back and take 'a new approach'. But first, you must prepare yourself. Before speaking to your child about quitting heroin, for the 1st, 2nd or 3rd time, it would be best to spend 30 minutes or more in silence, preparing yourself, meditating and thinking of what 'words' you will use to 'inspire', motivate and encourage your child to take action in their life and allow you to help him quit heroin and stay clean for good. And although everything might not go as planned, you'll come pretty close if you’re well prepared. (Side note: For example, you may want to put on a neutral, soft color shirt, such as a white or beige shirt as these colors can help provide a soothing and calming effect upon your child. A red shirt may cause your child to get up and walk out.) Make sure that you're 100% completely calm. Remove all anger, resentment, and frustration. Think on thoughts of when your son or daughter was just 7, 10, and 12 years old. Think of how they used to be before this heroin addiction took over, and hold on to those thoughts. That is the child whom you are going to save and bring back to life. To get the most positive response from your son or daughter, you will have to plan on a time where the both of you can talk in private without any interruptions whatsoever. You will also have to try your best to catch your child at the perfect time, when he or she is neither sick from withdrawals, nor too high from the heroin. For example; first thing in the morning may be the wrong time to talk to your child if they have not had their fix. They’ll be sick from the withdrawals and the only thing on their mind at that moment will be to get up, get out and get that first fix of the day just to feel normal. Likewise, it won’t do you any good to sit and talk with your child when he or she is high and sedated on heroin. He or she might start nodding and fall asleep right in front of you. You'll have to watch for the signs and get them at the right moment, possibly 1 to 2 hours after their first morning, afternoon, or last fix of the day. Making an appointment with them may or may not work. They might get scared and not show up at all. For the most part, if your child is living at home with you then you should already be aware of their behavioral patterns and daily routines. You may even want to ask them before hand if their feeling ok, enough to talk for just a couple of minutes. Just ask your child, "you got a minute?" Then when the time is right, move in for the save. Have your laptop nearby or be sitting close to your computer because in a few moments, you’re going to lead your child to my website. If you’ll both be moving closer to the computer then make sure that there are already 2 chairs in place. You’ll want to proceed as quickly as possible without any inconvenience. (You can also print out my articles beforehand and have them ready to hand to your child. But if your child manages to contact me from my site then you'll have one more person to help him.) Sit on your child's left side so that you can rub their backs with your right hand. Touch therapy works; especially when administered by a loved one who has a genuine love and concern for the person at hand. Yet the person administering the touch must in good health and in a positive state of mind.
"I'm starting to understand how you feel and what you go through and I'm very sorry that you have to go through all of that.” Re-assure them that you now have a better understanding of what their going through and why it's so hard for anyone to quit this habit. Although you will not understand exactly what they're going through unless you've been there yourself and have experienced firsthand the physical pain and mental torture of heroin withdrawal, you'll still have a better understand of what they're going through and now you can truly empathize with them. Now you might be able to become a partner on their level, instead of being the parent looking down on them. Now they might see you as an understanding person who can understand what they're going through. And now you're in agreement with them as to how hard it is to quit heroin. You are no longer the enemy whom they have to run and hide from. And you are now on their side, literally. While you’re speaking to your child, continue to speak to them in your most softest and kindest voice ever while rubbing their back to insure comfort and peace. If at any time he or she wants to speak then by all means let them talk without any interruptions from you while yet remaining focused on everything that has to be said. The more your child talks then the more they’ll loosen up, see you as their friend and hopefully begin to let you into their world. All you have to do is be quiet, listen and pay close attention. Your child may start giving clues on how to help them quit heroin and stay clean for good. Nod your head in agreement as you listen intently. Make eye contact for a moment and then look down. Make eye contact again and then look down again. Most people in this type of predicament talk more when you're not looking directly at them. Most people won't even look you in the eye when confronted. Therefore, by looking down, you’ll make it much easier for your child to talk to you more freely. Then somewhere in the conversation you have to start asking questions where you know their answers will be yes. You have to start getting them in the 'yes' mode. You can ask them or better yet make a closing statement such as; “so you really do want to quit this thing, don't you...”. “You really do want to turn your life around don't you”. The 'don't you' part is to get them to say yes on their own - yes, yes, yes.
Then pull up your laptop or both of you move up to the computer. Have the site ready or type in 'how to quit heroin' on google.com and my site should show up first place. Bring them right to the main page to where it says 'How to Quit Heroin'.
(You need not worry if your child finds and reads this article later on his own. They’ll thank you for it later. He will have a much better chance for success if he or she reads my site on their own.) And when you're done reading the main page, the main article called “How to Quit Heroin”, then ask him; “What do you think? What do you think is the best way for you to quit? In which manner would you like to quit this thing? Choose your weapon and let’s start from there”. Then be quiet and let him speak. Once he shows you which way HE wants to quit then shake his hand and tell him “lets do it”. And get started right there and then. Keep that momentum going. If your son or daughter chose Plan A then quickly start reading over my article titled “How to Quit Heroin Cold Turkey” followed by “How to Survive the First 7 Days” and then begin. Help them follow through. Try your best to help your child do 'everything' the articles tell them to do. (Those who do - succeed.) Make sure the both of you read both articles so that you’ll both be on the same page. You as the parent will have to switch rolls from mother or father to doctor or nurse, to coach, to best friend, and then back to parent again. And then go back to being a doctor and then back to trainer/coach again. Whatever you do, if your child starts crying, don't you start crying also. That will just bring the both of you down. But if you must cry, then make it quick and then cheer up quickly. If your child chose Plan B, quitting heroin warm turkey with lesser evil pharmaceutical drugs such as Valiums and Vicodins, then please read my article “How to Quit Heroin with Meds” and help them do what it tells them to do. If your son or daughter chose Plan C, quitting heroin with Methadone or Suboxone then read the lower section of the same article “Quitting Heroin with Meds” and then help them to get started. And if your child chose Plan D, quitting heroin in a drug rehabilitation center then great! Start calling your health care insurance company to see what your options are and then start making preparations. For this, you'll want to read my article “How to Quit Heroin in a Drug Rehab Center” to learn which characteristics to look for in a drug rehabilitation center. The only issue left will be the costs of enrolling your child into a good, clean and decent treatment facilities which will be dealt with by you and your health care provider. If your child is over 18 and you don't have health insurance but still have tons of cash left then you may be able to work out a payment plan with the drug treatment center. Your child however will at least want to find a way to pay you back in one form or another to show you some gratitude. If your child is over the age of 18 then any costs involved should be paid by them in one form or another. You should not have to pay for your sons' mistakes, unless of course, you too were not successful in raising your child correctly and are willing to take partial blame. But either way, they need to see this as a loan for the mean time if they want professional help in a drug rehabilitation center. But if it is financially attainable, and you've done all you can to help your child yourself, then by all means, do it. Send them to rehab. Whatever the case may be, try not to fret. The truth is, the best person to help your son or daughter quit this heroin addiction is you, the mother, and you the father. Your home can become you child's rehabilitation center. And if by chance your son or daughter becomes uncooperative at any time and walks out on you or even runs away then let them go. Don't say a word. Let him go. If you chase him then he'll run. But if you stay still, remain calm and be quiet then he will come back. Sooner or later he will come back. Hopefully, your child will not leave it at that, especially after seeing how calm, helpful, loving and supportive you've been to them, especially after realizing that the only hope he/she has left is you, their mother, and you, their father. Hopefully, it will eat at them from the inside out. Hopefully, he'll be back. She'll be back. And if he or she does come back determined to quit heroin, then welcome them with open arms and start all over again with an even more positive attitude. And this time, re-read my article and do what you didn't do or left out on the first round. And I do realize that in many cases, there may come a time in which you have given your child so many chances and opportunity to change yet to no avail, and that sooner or later you may have to put your foot down and send them on their way. If they simply don’t want to quit then their only hope may be “complete detachment”, where you tell your child; “I love you, and I really hope you’ll quit using heroin. I’m willing to do whatever I can to help you quit this thing, stay clean, and turn your life around. But you need to decide which relationship is more important to you. Is it your relationship with heroin? Or is it your relationship with your family? But until then you can’t have both. It’s either heroin or your family.” If they choose you, the family, then great! Help them! But if they choose heroin then send them on their way. This may be harsh, and it is, but it just might be their only hope left, and you might just very well save their life. Heroin addiction doesn't get better by itself. It only gets worse. “Complete detachment” or what they call tough love is the last resort. But until then, as long as he truly wants to quit, then you'll have to do everything in your power to avoid getting to that place. You'll have to do whatever it takes to keep encouraging and influencing your child in a positive manner in order to get them on 'the right path' and help keep them there. Whatever you do, don't give up now. Don't ever give up on your child. Don't ever lose hope. And don't ever stop fighting for the life of your son or daughter. And from here on out, your most famous words to your son or daughter will be, “You can do this... You can do this”. You can begin to brain wash your child with these words in a positive manner to the point to where they actually start believing that they really CAN do this. They CAN whip this thing and turn their life around once and for all! Words move people. Words backed by positive emotions, move, inspire and motivate people to do the seemingly impossible. What if my son or daughter lives away from home? If your son or daughter is living elsewhere, away from home, then walk them through it over the phone just as mentioned above. Speak to them (on the phone) in a kind, soft, and gentle manner and let them know that if they truly want to quit heroin then they do have options. If they truly want to quit then work with them and walk them through it. Explain to your child their options for quitting heroin based upon what you've learned. And then ask them, "which way would you prefer to quit?" Then proceed accordingly. If they truly feel bad about all the wrong they've done to you and your family and truly want to quit, then help them. If they truly have a heart felt desire to quit heroin, stay clean, and turn their lives around then help them. Help them to do so. But... If they keep calling you asking for money one day, and then telling you the next day that they want to quit, then the next day asking for more money, and then the day after that calling to chit chat as if all was well then obviously they're not serious about quitting, at least not right now. And if this be the case then the best thing to do for you and for your child would be to start pulling back. Don't chase them, don't call them, don't text them, don't email them, nothing. If they're not serious about quitting heroin and changing their lives then start pulling back. If you've offered them help, and directed them to my website and they still have not put forth a genuine effort to change then start pulling back. Your son or daughter should only be calling you for 2 reasons and 2 reasons only, and that is to apologize for hurting you, (and the family), and to reach out for help. Otherwise, they don't deserve to have that closeness after all the hurt they've caused you. Don't let them have the best of both worlds. Don't let them have heroin and that family closeness at the same time. It's one or the other. You can not force them to quit heroin but you can force them to make a choice. -Heroin, or the family- If they call you asking for help then yes, talk to them, guide them, direct them. But if they're calling you for small talk or to ask for money, then say no, make it short, and end the conversation. If they call you and act as if all is well and nothing is wrong then keep quiet, cut it short and end the conversation. And even then, you must continue to remain calm at all times. They need to know and feel that all is not well and that you and your family are very hurt over the matter. And if they want to make things right then they need to choose you, the family, over heroin. They need to put forth a genuine effort to seek help and quit this thing once and for all. Most drug addicts wont change until something drastic happens in their lives. And pulling away will begin the process. So whatever you do, don't allow them to have the best of both worlds. And don't act like all is well. Because it's not. And it wont be until they do the right thing. And pulling away may be just enough to get them to start thinking and start heading in the right direction, and give you some peace as well. Worse case scenario: If you simply can't get through to your child at all then send them a text message with my website address: www.HowtoQuitHeroin.com That's it. Nothing more, nothing less. And then hopefully, your child will visit my website out of curiosity. From there, the rest is up to them. Anything can happen. So let's hope for the best. Remember: This is a fight - a fight for the lives of your children. So plan wisely and then execute your plan with full force. And whatever you do, don't slow down now. Keep pressing on and keep moving forward. And always try your best to show your child nothing but love, kindness, and compassion. Just as the song says, Love Can Build a Bridge: www.youtube.com/watch You can do this. You CAN begin to influence your child to at least start moving in the right direction. You can try your very best to lead your son or daughter on 'the right path'. You can help your child to quit heroin, stay clean and turn their life around once and for all. You have more control over how your child's life turns out than what you might think. You CAN make a difference, starting now. Good luck. And may the 'Good Force' be with you.
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| Main l How to Quit Heroin l How to Quit Heroin Cold Turkey l How to Survive the First 7 Days l Real Testimonies l Contact Me | |||||||||||||||||
| Copyright 2008-2012 HowtoQuitHeroin.com info@howtoquitheroin.com | |||||||||||||||||
